What’s the connection between a shark attack and an average day at work? The challenges at the office aren’t all that different from a predator’s jaws coming at you, where swift, rational thinking and action is most needed, according to emotional intelligence expert Travis Bradberry.

Bradberry’s Dalai-Lama-endorsed book Emotional Intelligence 2.0 begins with the story of Butch Conner, who was attacked by a white shark while surfing off the coast of northern California. Conner’s story details his thoughts and his reactions to the 14-foot shark that swam tightly around him, knocked him off his surfboard and made an open-jaw attempt on his life. Bradberry notes that Conner broke through his fear, which temporarily froze him, and used rational thinking to defend himself by stabbing the shark with the nose of his surfboard. He survived without a scratch.

How many business books begin with a detailed account of shark attack? Probably, only one, this one. (Full disclosure: Conner’s shark attack story was first published in Surfing’s Greatest Misadventures, which I edited. The misadventures book is required reading for surfers, and now, I suppose, it also makes for good reading for CEOs.)

Having spent many years studying behaviors and interactions that produce success in the workplace, Bradberry, who holds dual Ph.Ds in clinical and industrial psychology, has found that those who understand and manage their emotions tend to succeed more than those who don’t manage their emotions well.

“Emotional intelligence,” says Bradberry, “is the other kind of smart. It’s having an awareness of your emotions, tendencies and the experience of others and then using that awareness to proactively manage your response to situations and people to avoid pitfalls and create better opportunities.”

How the book works
Emotional Intelligence 2.0 is an instruction manual of sorts, with step-by-step plans that teach you to observe your actions and reactions to various situations and, when needed, choose a better course of action.

The book includes a pass code to a proprietary emotional intelligence test—used by many Fortune 500 companies to evaluate their employees—which otherwise costs $39.95. The test measures your EQ on a scale of 1 to 100 in four key competencies: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management.

Bradberry suggests that readers take the test and then practice three skills to help them improve in the one competency area where they scored lowest. The book presents a menu of 66 skills, all derived from extensive research conducted on how people actually increase their EQ.

I scored lowest in social awareness. After taking the test, I turned to the Social Awareness Strategies chapter that offers 16 improvement ideas. The three that I picked were 1) greet people by name, 2) plan ahead for social situations and 3) develop a back-pocket question—here are two that I came up with: “What’s your favorite Web site?” and “What’s the longest you’ve gone without sleep?” These conversation starters can get you out of an awkward moment.

The techniques are pretty simple, and they work to make for more successful interactions. The catch is that you have to keep up the new way of doing things for three to six months before they become habitual. And, as we all know, old habits die hard.

Are Leaders Born or Made?

Almost everyone, at some point in time, can lead. We can all rise to the occasion, realize that this is our moment, and lead a crowd of people out of a burning building, or answer some other immediate cause. All of us can lead situationally.

The difference with true leaders, however, is that leading is a part of their character. It’s part of their style and underlying sense of purpose. And, it turns out it’s something they’re born with – to a degree.

In a recent study we conducted, more than 300 presidents and chief executive officers were asked, “Is leadership predominantly something you are born with or something that you develop through experience?”

They shared that, on average, they felt they were born with 40 percent of their leadership ability and developed the remaining 60 percent through experience.

“True leadership,” says Chris Williston, president of Independent Bankers Association of Texas, “is not something that can be learned — only enhanced, when an individual has a natural ability to begin with. Leaders can be coached to be more effective, but ultimately they are born with much of their leadership abilities.”

Profile of a Leader

So what are the personality qualities that account for this starting point of leadership — this innate ability?

Through personality testing, we’ve found that great leaders were:

• Adept at creating a vision and influencing and directing others.
• Skillful at building strategic relationships that help them accomplish their goals.
• Masterful at solving problems and overcoming obstacles.
• Willing to take risks and try new ideas and approaches.

In essence, these leaders are extremely bright, assertive, driven to persuade, empathic and resilient. Having a need to get things accomplished, they are willing to take risks. They are also moderately sociable, demonstrating a healthy level of skepticism, and are motivated to come up with new ideas.

That’s a very strong profile. And it needs to be.

Williston points out, “Leaders are at the heart of the organization. They are strong motivators. They need to be the number one cheerleader. And they can’t have down days. There are too many people relying on them.”

With so many people relying on them, leaders — even with their innate abilities and strong profiles — need to continually hone their skills, further develop their talents, and strive to be even better than the previous year.

Finding the Right Followers

In the previously mentioned study, we asked the same 300 leaders, what they considered to be the most important aspects — and the most difficult — of being a leader.

Surrounding oneself with the right people was selected as the second most important responsibility of leaders. It was second only to creating the right vision.

Even if you’ve created the perfect vision, without the people to help carry it out, you won’t get there. The leader’s job is to help people work together as a team. Once you realize this, it becomes incredibly obvious how important it is to have the right people in place.

However, surrounding oneself with the right people was also selected as one of the three most difficult aspects of being an effective leader, just behind maintaining momentum and developing staff. So how do you do it?

Finding the right people involves a number of elements, but one key is to hire for the following qualities and skills:

• People who you feel you would enjoy working with
• People who are bright and engaging (particularly for sales positions)
• People who can give examples of being conscientious
• People who have a demonstrated aptitude for solving problems

Managing Yourself

Often, the difficulty in surrounding yourself with the right people starts further back than the hiring process. It begins with the leader him or herself. In order to be an effective business leader, you first have to know and be able to manage yourself. Only then can you begin to do the same for others.

When we’ve led Vistage groups in discussions about what really drives them, we get very diverse answers. While there are certain similarities in their underlying makeup, each individual has a different style and unique motivators. We know leaders are great at some things — creating a vision and seeing the big picture, for example, and not so great at others — such as detail work and being patient. When you look at what really motivates you, you can find your blind spots and bring them to the surface. Then you can decide whether to manage them or manage around them.

Jim Santore , president of Progressive Handling Systems in Rockaway, N.J., is continually seeking ways to enhance his own leadership skills.

“Since joining the Vistage group and working with Caliper, I really believe my business is better,” he explains. “The interaction with other CEOs, hearing how they’re dealing with similar issues, is motivating and provides great insights. It’s difficult to discuss a lot of the problems you face as a leader with the people you work with every day. In the Vistage group, they look at you differently. They’re not expecting anything from you. They don’t have an agenda other than helping you.”

In addition to collaborating with other leaders, Santore is also taking a deeper look into his own personality traits.

“I work with Caliper’s personality assessments to learn more about myself and my employees,” he shares. “The insights are great on both levels. The assessment pegged me as very much the ‘hunter.’ And I am. So many traits — my assertiveness, urgency, lack of patience, risk-taking — were off the charts. Even though I know those things about myself, seeing it in black and white in front of me made me realize the severity of it. It made me understand I had a number of things to work on.”

He also confides, “When I shared my own results with employees, they found it humorous that I was surprised at the severity of it. They said, ‘See what we’ve had to deal with!’ It really pointed out that there are times I can be tough to get along with. It actually made me more appreciative of the people around me. I have a good group of people. And by also knowing more about each of their own motivators as well as areas where they can improve, I am in a better position to help them develop to their full potential — which is great for them and the organization.”

This self-assessment process is the first step in becoming a truly great leader. In his book, Primal Leadership, Daniel Goleman talks about a critical second step as well: Getting an objective picture of “your real self” by actively seeking out feedback about your performance and behavior from subordinates and colleagues.

He explains, however, that often leaders avoid directly asking for feedback — especially negative feedback — and most subordinates aren’t jumping at the chance to offer constructive criticism to their bosses. From conversations with leaders, they are not avoiding feedback because they think they’re infallible, rather they seem to believe they can’t change. But Goleman shares that there is evidence that “Old leaders can learn new tricks.”

Here are some suggestions for enhancing your leadership abilities:

• Actively seek out suggestions for improving your performance from subordinates and colleagues as part of a continual, ongoing, improvement process.
• Ask people for feedback about your strengths so you remain aware of them and ensure you are playing to them.
• Get a personal coach.
• Identify potential leaders, then coach them to develop their leadership skills.
• Emphasize and build upon the strengths of others.

Remember, Goleman says in his book, “The number one reason people cite for quitting is dissatisfaction with the boss. People with bad bosses are four times more likely to leave than are those who appreciate the leader they work for.”

So, if you’ve been born with that 40 percent of natural leadership ability — you must do your part to continually enhance, improve and perfect the remaining sixty percent, if your goal is to be a truly great leader.

Ultimately, leadership is a journey that is continually evolving. What worked last year won’t necessarily work next year. True leaders recognize this and adapt, and they teach their employees how to adapt as well. We all need to do things in our jobs we like and don’t like. Understanding people’s natural tendencies and motivations can help you map out specific plans, create a discipline for yourself and others in order to take care of a shortcoming, or find people to fill in the gaps. The more in tune leaders are with themselves and their team, the stronger the organization is as a whole.